7 Things You Can Register For If You Don’t Plan On Having A Baby Or A Wedding

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Childfree people who don’t plan on tying the knot get royally screwed. They never get the opportunity to peruse a registry and be showered with gifts. What gives? This is pretty much bullshit, if you ask me.

We all know that very few people have a burning desire to buy someone swaddling blankets or china – we do it because we’ve deemed these friends worthy enough to receive gifts to commemorate what society has labeled a “gift-worthy” milestone. Well, there are plenty of gift-worthy milestones that have nothing to do with pushing a baby out of your vagina or legally merging with someone who statistically you will divorce over 50 percent of the time anyway.

Here are some ways to get people to shower you with gifts, because damn it – you’re worth it!

1. Planting a garden.

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2. Going on vacation.

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3. Delving into online dating.

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4. Becoming Crossfit obsessed.

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5. Entering the nine-to-five job market.

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6. Becoming a home beer-brewer.

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7. Learning a new language.

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(all cards made on