Fetus Gets Its Own Facebook Page

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You know what’s really cheesy? When parents document their child’s every move on Facebook. The best – and by best I mean worst – is when parents write posts along the lines of: “Happy birthday to my sweet 2-year-old girl, the light of my life and the beat of my heart. You have changed how I view the world and I love you.” As if the kid can even read! And, besides, do you really need to publicize this to 500 of your nearest and dearest?

A Texas couple has taken this self-indulgence to a whole new level by creating a Facebook page for their unborn child named Marriah Greene (yes, people, we’re talking about a profile of an embryo). Marriah’s parents, Matthew and Ellie Greene, told ABC News that they were looking for a playful way to tell all their friends the baby was coming – and to keep them up to date on the progress of Ellie’s pregnancy. (Posts were written from the fetus’s point of view, such as: “IKEA is fun, mom is doing the shopping thing again. What is going to get me now?” Gag.)

Marriah acquired hundreds of Facebook friends within hours. Pretty soon, their story got picked up by a slew of media outlets, including CNN. Facebook must have tuned in to the hoopla: as of last night, little Marriah’s page was no longer active (when The Blaze reached out to Ellie asking if the social networking site had deleted the profile, she said, “I think so.” Facebook has a strict age policy that requires all users to be at least 13 years old).

Matthew has since created a more acceptable Facebook group for his darling little fetus. Members have so far posted comments like “Marriah, can’t wait to hold you” and “beautiful baby!”

The most recent post? “Bad karma to all the haters.”

She must be speaking directly to me.