I Come From A Long Line Of Witches And Even I Don’t Know If These Fertility Spells Can Get You Pregnant

originalI always feel for women having difficulty conceiving. It can be a frustrating, heartbreaking, complicated process and I understand people will sometimes go to desperate measures in order to conceive. We talk about infertility and trying to conceive a lot here on Mommyish, so I’m not going to expound on that. It’s a serious topic that deserves respect and a degree of seriousness that I won’t get into here, because this topic is all about witchery and all these amazing ways I found on the Internet that say they can help you get pregnant.

All the witches in the house raise your hand!

Come on now, I know we have some pagan readers and I come from a long line of witches. Actually, I think the term they used in the old country was herbalists, but my grandmama could read the hell out of some tea leaves and tell your fortune by boiling some lead and had all sorts of homeopathic remedies for everything. I don’t think she would have minded being called a witch, but I know some people take offense at that term and consider it a form of slander. I wish I was a witch, which is weird for me, because I don’t even read my horoscope, but I do think some aspects of witchery are very cool, and make sense. I’m a rational person, but I do think that a lot of aspects of the whole thing appeal to me, especially because I’m a feminist.

But what I can’t get behind is some of these weird witchery items being hocked to women desperate to conceive. I suppose if you take it all with a grain of salt and are just doing it for the hell of it, it is fine, but some of these things cost big bucks and that offends me, the idea of preying off people who want to birth a baby more than anything. Some of these items will return your money if they don’t work, which is good. During my investigations I found a lot of positive feedback to some of these items and spells too. And a lot of women, especially on UK message boards, claim some of these totally work.

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If someone can cure AIDS and enlarge your penis, give you a VISA and get you pregnant, I have a really hard time believing it.

Customized fertility spells, seriously. 

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Just pay Miss Mia the money and voila.

Ancient Angelic Magic Fertility and Healthy Pregnancy

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From Etsy, a bargain at one hundred dollars.

Fertility JuJu Doll Baby 


This little doll is cute, but no guarantees it will actually get you pregnant.

 Raccoon Penis Bone 


This listing from Artisan Alchemy says fertility in the title , but also has the legend of a man wanting to win a woman’s heart by giving her a penis bone to wear around her neck. It should be noted that I have sadly never received a penis bone.

From Extreme Spells:

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Which you can purchase here.

Anyone ever conceive with the help of witchery? Do you believe in all of this fully or are you more of a skeptic like I am? Also, do you want to join my coven? I plan on serving cupcakes.

This article idea comes from lovely Mommyish reader 88Mwife who spent a great deal of time yesterday showering me with links to witchery fertility stuff! Thank you 88Mwife!

(Image: tumblr)

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