Fergie’s Husband Is Push Present Shopping, Implies Ladies Came Up With Another Way To Milk Dudes Of Cash

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Fergie aka Stacey Ferguson, Josh Duhamel The New Year's Eve party at 1 OAK at The Mirage Hotel and Casino - ArrivalsNothing quite gets my eyes a rolling like “push presents.” While I do not see anything wrong with a freshly postpartum lady lobbying for that flatscreen TV she has been wanting or getting a nice spa visit, the sheer marketing “push” to normalize and shill fancy jewelry for something as sacred as a baby birth makes me cringe. Nevertheless, even I can muster the appreciation for Rebecca Eckler‘s push present, and I probably could have for Fergie‘s hypothetical push present too. That is, if her husband Josh Duhamel hadn’t insinuated that push presents are a female masterminded plot to steal all your man partner’s money.

Us Weekly reports that the soon-to-be dad isn’t quite sure what he’ll be getting his wife, but a push present is definitely happening. He also added:

“You got Christmas, you got birthdays, you got Valentine’s, you got Mother’s Day, you got every other thing in between … I don’t know who came up with this push present idea, but I think it’s probably a female.”

As if ladies are just sitting around crafting sneaky ways to milk those dollars. It’s not like the money-grubbing gold digger is a harmful stereotype towards women or anything.  As ladies with lady parts, we’re hard fucking wired for material consumption. Just dangle some sparkles in our face and all of sudden we start salivating. Jewels are pretty much the only thing worth having boobs for, right?

While “push presents” were reportedly NOT invented by the jewelry industry, they’re not exactly complaining. A nice physical token of appreciation after the birth of a child may have always been knocking around homes, but the ubiquitousness of said fancy gifts (à la Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day) certainly can be attributed to those behind most fluffy influential trends: marketers. I believe the word Josh is looking for is “marketers.” Savvy marketers (of perhaps both the lady and man variety if we need to split genders) are the ones pushing the push present nonsense and no doubt, some women are buying it hand over fist. These are probably the same people who relabeled a vacation while you happen to be pregnant “babymoons.”

(photo: WENN)