Father’s Day Cards: Apparently Dads Are Either Absent, Useless Or Big Ol’ Farting Machines

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father's day greetingsWhat’s with Father’s Day cards being stuck in 1992? Or maybe 1942 is more like it. Because the ones I’m seeing are so stereotypical, so totally old-school, that I’m kind of embarrassed for the Hallmarks of the world. I’m even embarrassed for, which is shocking since that site is my life. I actually went on it the other day and browsed through their selection of Father’s Day cards. Sure, there was the odd gem that made me laugh out loud, but most of them focused on absent dads, or deadbeat ones, or ones who have zero interests outside of golfing, farting and channel-surfing. Um, hi, is this not 2012? Don’t these people know that today’s dads are highly evolved creatures? They wipe their babies’ bums and everything.

Here’s a roundup of the lamest Father’s Day cards we could find.