Enter The World Of Baby Bullet Infomercial Parodies. You Won’t Regret It.
So there’s a device called The Baby Bullet. It’s the baby food processor version of the food processor called the Magic Bullet. On the one hand, I never figure out why parents can’t use a simple immersion blender to blend their baby food. On the other hand, I want a Beaba BabyCook as bad as the next woman (just not willing to give up precious counter space or the $150 they want for it).
Okay, so the infomercial for this Baby Bullet is the most bizarre infomercial of the year. The conceit is that we’re witnessing a baby shower. And one guest’s gift is a Baby Bullet! But rather than just give the Baby Bullet, she goes on a full 10-minute demo of the product. Because, what we all want in a baby shower is for one of the guests to hijack the event in order to try and hock a crappy appliance, right?
Everything about this infomercial is weird, crazy and kind of awesome. Take the violent name. Who thinks “baby food” when they hear “baby bullet”? And then there’s the happy face on every component of this device — a device containing blades and marketed to families with infants. The infomercial features a thoroughly drunk grandma, a browbeaten husband, his totally insane wife (she’s cradling an empty blanket and pretending a baby is inside it), a passive aggressive mother and various other annoying characters.
Okay, so here’s the parody. Some one mixed the commercial with horror music, slowed down and lowered everyone’s voices and made this creepy video:
I watched all seven minutes. Three times. My husband says, “I have no idea what to make of this except to say that I find it hilarious for reasons I don’t want to understand.” That’s kind of my take, too.
Apparently there’s a whole world of Baby Bullet videos. Yes, I may have watched them all last night. There’s the Andrew Firestone (remember “The Batchelor”?) testimonial:
You can watch just those scenes with Drunk Grandma:
Just the scenes featuring long-suffering husband Al:
Just the fight scenes between scary Lindsay and her mean Mom:
There’s an earlier parody that riffs on the idea that the Baby Bullet might be more sinister and less useful than advertised:
And here’s an animation of a woman trying to explain the Baby Bullet to her mother:
If you’re up for the full 10-minute original infomercial, we have that, too: