Childrearing

Being On A Breastfeeding Elimination Diet Means You Get Nothing Yummy

By  | 

Elimination Diet Breastfeeding“Have you thought about giving up dairy?” the pediatrician asked, taking my daughter’s dirty diaper from me and passing it off to an assistant.

“No,” I said, politely, and in my head I followed it with “I don’t really believe in the whole ‘elimination diet’ bullshit.”

“Well, a fair amount of breastfed babies have trouble with digesting dairy.  We’ll test her poop, and if it’s got blood in it, that’ll tell us what we need to know.”

“Okay,” I said, lilting up the “ay” in the way you do when you’re trying to humor somebody but you know it’s ridiculous.  My first baby breastfed basically until she was a teenager with no trouble, my newborn was putting on weight like a champ (a heavyweight champ), and, most importantly, I really love cheese.  Like, really love cheese.

Welp, there was blood in her poop and in that instant, my life went from “pretty crappy because I have a newborn” to “really, really fucking crappy because I have a newborn.”

When I look back at those first days, I can’t believe how stupid I was.  I ate two entire bags of Nacho Cheese Doritos because that’s how I roll, without even considering that it has cheese right in the name.  I bought chocolate milk for my older daughter in the store and took a swig out of the top to help mitigate spillage potential.  I put cream in my coffee out of habit and because I am a human being, not some sort of animal.

I had to go back to the doctor a few days later for the millionth ear infection of my older daughter, and I asked them to check the newborn’s poop again. I was shocked, shocked! that it wasn’t better.

Turns out that if your baby is intolerant to milk proteins, you have to completely clear your diet of those proteins and even then, she may not heal for a month (a literal lifetime for bebeh).  Turns out there’s a pretty good chance she’s also intolerant to soy.  Turns out there’s soy in everything – everything – that you didn’t pull directly out of the ground.

I ended up giving up milk, butter, soy, wheat, and eggs, because once you can’t have cheese and soy, you might as well just commit yourself to eating raw vegetables and cardboard and be done with it.  It takes so long for the sores to clear up in the baby’s stomach that it felt barbaric to do a trial and error thing.

Pages: 1 2