Women's Issues

‘Drunk Female Guests Are The Gravest Threat To Fraternities’ Says Forbes Writer

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There is so much stupid in this article it’s unreal. Here is a direct quote from his piece — which you can no longer find on the internet, because apparently the entire editorial staff who was asleep when this got published decided to wake up or something. But thankfully Google cache exists, so we can still see it in all of its victim-blamey glory:

Here are the things that worry me most. Any of them could result in organizational extinction, even if the fraternity never served the “victim” a single drop of alcohol:

Alcohol poisoning due to overconsumption before, during, or after an event. Death or grievous injury as a result of falling down the stairs or off a balcony. Death or grievous injury as a result of a pedestrian or traffic accident as the young lady weaves her way home. False accusation of rape months after the fact triggered by regrets over a drunken hook-up, or anger over a failed relationship. And false 911 calls accusing our members of gang rape during a party in progress. (Yes, this happened, resulting in seven police cars and thirty officers storming the chapter house.)

Did your head explode yet? Well, keep reading:

In our age of sexual equality, why drunk female students are almost never characterized as irresponsible jerks is a question I leave to the feminists. But it is precisely those irresponsible women that the brothers must be trained to identify and protect against, because all it takes is one to bring an entire fraternity system down.

Also remember to click the Google cache link above, so you can marvel at the stock image someone chose to illustrate the article, of a drunk woman on the floor, passed out and clutching a bottle. Keep it classy, Forbes.

I’m having a hard time wrapping my head around the whole point of this op-ed, but I’m pretty sure it’s something along the lines of, “Sorry guys. We can’t get away with being as rapey as we used to. But it’s definitely not your fault. Nothing is your fault. Ever. Girls are dumb.” Yes, I think that is an accurate summary of Frezza’s piece.

He ends with a brainstorming session in which he proposes that fraternities drink less hard alcohol and have a doorman so the super drunk girls can’t get in. He seems pretty nostalgic for the time when they could, though:

Identify drunks at the door. I don’t care how pretty or flirtatious a young lady is; if she’s visibly intoxicated, don’t let her in. Although we were once reprimanded for turning away a drunk female student who ultimately required an ambulance when she passed out on our sidewalk, it would have gone a lot worse for us had she collapsed inside.

Frezza, were you drunk when you wrote this garbage? Are you drunk right now? I hope you are getting the adequate public-shaming you deserve. I’m just here to help.

(photo: Nagel Photography/ Shutterstock)

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