5 Reasons It Sucks To Have A December Birthday

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3. No one wants to eat your birthday cake.

Admittedly less of an issue when I was a child and could eat sugar, wrapped in sugar, drizzled with some sugar without consequence and would therefore make a fuss about having a cake no matter what, as an adult, I can’t remember the last time anyone got me a birthday cake. Between recovering from Thanksgiving indulgences and navigating their way through platters of Christmas cookies, no one wants yet another treat foisted upon them. Which is why no one ever gets me a cake. Yes, I’m saving room for peppermint bark like everyone else, but blowing out candles and eating frosting that isn’t red or green would be a nice acknowledgement of my existence on this planet for another year. Maybe this year I’ll treat myself to a cupcake for one.

4. All your birthday gifts are holiday related.

Whether it’s wrapped in paper that’s covered in snowmen or Christmas themed gifts like a stuffed reindeer or gingerbread scented body lotion, the vast majority of gifts I’ve in my nearly 31 years on this Earth have been related to Christmas in some way. Sure, it’s the thought that counts, but try telling that to a little girl who with a closet full of Christmas sweaters she can only wear for the 13 days following her birthday without looking ridiculous.

5. The only birthday party themes available are ‘Holly’ and ‘Jolly’.

Unless you throw a full-blown, bratty tantrum and demand that the tree go up after your special day like I did circa 1991, if you are December baby your house will be decorated for Christmas on your birthday. All of the photos will have a festooned tree or stockings in the background, leaving you to wonder years later if it was taken on your birthday, or on Christmas. Even if your mom tries to get some party supplies that aren’t red or green, pickings in the store are slim this time of year. Eventually, you decide it doesn’t matter, since everyone else treats Christmas and your birthday as one and the same, you may as well embrace it and have a silver and gold themed party that no one will come to anyway, because it’s going to snow.

Merry Birthday to all the December babies out there!

(Image: Shutterstock)

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