Douchebag Dad Publicly Shames His 4-Year-Old For Doing 4-Year-Old Stuff

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rob-devine-publicly-shames-sonFor the love of all things that are good and holy, can we please, please, please stop making our children hold up “shame signs”? It’s ridiculous and it’s counterproductive and it makes you look like a big narcissistic douche.

I’m looking at you, father of four-year-old boy who spent entirely too much time hand lettering a big sign that says “I HIT LITTLE GIRLS :(”

According to HLN, Rob Devine, from Monroe, Michigan thought up this brilliant and groundbreaking idea when his son Tristan, got in trouble for hitting the little girls in his classroom. He claims that when he took away Tristan’s games and toys, he still couldn’t get him to stop being such a little shit, so he decided to take the logical next step: shaming him publicly through the use of the sign on a busy street.

Rob, who is already going for World’s Douchiest Doucher with his Beastie Boys shirt and his weird unkempt beard is very pleased with himself. He said that he clearly needed to do the whole sign thing because otherwise, his son was just going to keep on acting like he was a four-year-old. The dad said he needed his son to know that these things won’t “just go unnoticed”.

Why are people still doing this?

This is the opposite of reasonable discipline. This kind of attention grabby punishment only seems to appeal to a certain kind of person; the one who sees another person do it, thinks it’s fantastic, and then waits with bated breath for their own kid to fuck up so that they can do it too.

Listen. Four-year-old boys hit little girls. Four-year-old girls hit little boys. Four-year-olds hit other four-year-olds regardless of gender. Not all of them, sure, but some of them. Hell, my daughter was a sweet little meek thing when she was four, and even she walloped a little boy who wouldn’t stop walloping her. It’s the circle of wallops.

Obviously there had to be discipline, but I don’t think shaming is right for a kid that young. There are really very few instances in which I think public shaming is right as a punishment anyway, and this doesn’t even come close to qualifying.

Tristan’s mother, who looks like she was just waiting with bated breath for Rob to do something moronic like this, picked her son up the day after, and called CPS on what is presumably her ex.

She does say it pretty succinctly when she says, “Rob has had issues in his life, and no one put him out on the street… made him use a sign.”

Indeed. I’d also like to point out that because Rob has cultivated his douchitude so lovingly, if I saw him out on the street with a sign that said “I HIT LITTLE GIRLS :(” I’m not sure if I’d even notice that he had a four-year-old companion.

Lest you think I’m being too hard on Sir Rob of the brilliant ideas, consider this. Despite the fact that he might not see his son again, despite the fact that no one else seems to think that this is a “parenting win”, despite the fact that he could be investigated by CPS, despite all of that, when asked if he regretted what he did, he said “not at all”, and said that if his son’s behavior persisted he would “figure out something else”. Which maybe seems like every day is opposite day for Rob, since he probably should have “figured out something else” before using public humiliation on a child hardly old enough to consistently not pee the bed.

I think that from now on we should indulge these people to the fullest extent. They clearly want attention, so I think it’s time that they start holding up signs that say things like, ” I am a raging narcissist who uses my children to get airtime” or “I have a barely competent grasp on disciplining my child” or “I PUBLICLY SHAME LITTLE BOYS 🙁 :(”

(Image: CNN)