Daycare Is Not Raising My Kids


I am a daycare mom. I work full-time from home, and so does my husband. From close to one year old, both of my kids have been enrolled in half-day daycare at local in-home daycares in our area. When they first started daycare, I had all of the same fears as any new parent. I was worried that they wouldn’t like it; I was worried that they would feel lost and alone without me; I was especially worried about neglecting them while I was at work.

After sending both of my kids to daycare for close to two years, I’ve realized that all of these worries are unfounded. My oldest son continues to be very open, comfortable, and outgoing. I believe the interaction with his little peers in his daycare class has helped immensely. Both of my kids run into daycare as soon as they get there. To me, it appears they truly enjoy it.

For a parent who busts their ass working all week long and forks over a sizable chunk of their paycheck to pay for daycare, it is a slap in the face to hear this parenting decision insulted:

I did feel guilty in the beginning, but watching him thrive in his new environment made me realize that I had made the right choice. The hardest part of sending him there is not so much the comments from family, but the comments from friends. One friend of my husband’s made a comment a few months ago that ‘daycare raising your child for you’, which I’m still pretty angry about right now (his wife is a SAMH).

Just wanted to know how other working moms deal with the judgement that comes from certain aspects of society as well as some fellow moms or individuals?   I went back to work full-time after my son was born out of necessity.  I would give anything to be a SAHM.  But I don’t think it is wrong for a mom to want to have a career.  I have guilt for leaving my little boy during the day but I know I am doing it to give him a better life.  And I dedicate every ounce of my being to him.  Yet some try to make me feel inferior or say that leaving them at a sitter or daycare is letting some else raise them…

Some people (usually people who are not mothers or fathers themsleves) state that when a woman works outside the home, she and the child’s father have to pay strangers to take care of the kids. They wax on about how horrrrrible that is. “OMFG! Strangers raising your kids?!”

This outside judgment about the concept of ”paying strangers to raise your kids” is totally off-base. I think any parent who has ever put their child in daycare can attest to the fact that it is still possible to have a strong bond with your child, even if you work outside of the home. A young child who goes to daycare all day long, or even for part of the day, can still have a very loving relationship with their parents; working parents are just as hands-on as stay-at-home parents, in many cases.

But this really isn’t a competition. We are all trying to raise our kids the best way we know how. The only reason this attitude is worth pointing out is because it is extremely hurtful to a working parent like me. I’m working my hardest all day long to provide for my family. The last thing I want to hear is that my child is suffering for it.

(Image: Olesya Feketa/Shutterstock)

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