Cards Against Humanity Sold Boxes Of Bull S**t On Black Friday And In True American Fashion, People Actually Bought Them
While millions of people left their homes to shop on Thanksgiving or went the “conservative” route and headed out in the wee hours on Friday morning to buy more shit they don’t need, Cards Against Humanity sold boxes of shit. Actually, bull shit- as in, the shit of a real bull. I am a huge fan of Cards Against Humanity so this is just one more reason for me to love them. They are making a mockery of Black Friday in the most perfect way and the best part is, the worst offenders, the people who WOULD push someone out of the way for the last Xbox, will never understand why this is so absolutely hysterical.
Cards Against Humanity, for the uninitiated, is basically the most fun grown-up card game you will ever play. If you want to find out how to play, check their website. Their motto is “a party game for horrible people” and that is pretty accurate. This is why it comes as no surprise to me that they actually mailed people who ordered their “holiday bullshit” some genuine bull shit. Many who ordered are ardent fans of the game and were wondering if by ordering, they would be rewarded with some fun, top-secret game cards but Cards Against Humanity was quick to quell that hope in their website’s FAQ’s:
Are you selling any of your normal products today?Â No.
Is this actually poop?Â Yes.
Is it also something thatâ€™s not poop?Â No.
Can I return it when I realize that itâ€™s actually just poop?Â No.
Is the poop dangerous?Â No. The poop is sterilized.
Is it legal to mail poop?Â Only one way to be sure.
Why is the poop only $6?Â Through the magic of incredible Black Friday super-savings.
I want to open-mouth kiss whoever wrote this. I love how they are protesting the bullshit that is Black Friday shopping by only selling REAL feces the entire day. It is even better than what they did last year which was to raise the price of the game for Black Friday. The best part of all is the amazing emails they posted on their website of people who, despite this very clear FAQ stating that it was in fact actual shit, got pretty upset when they realized it was no joke:
I don’t know about any of you, but I practically fell out of my chair laughing at these emails. As much fun as an expansion pack all about poop would be, come on, how stupid can one get? If someone tells you that what you are buying is actual crap, maybe you should believe them. This Twitter response from the founder of the game pretty much sums up my feelings on this topic:
It’s great advice and considering all the useless shit people will buy this holiday season, it might do them well to listen when someone comes right out and admits it. Bravo, Cards Against Humanity. You’ve outdone yourselves.