Should I Be Freaked Out That This Breastfeeding Doll Is Freaking Me Out?

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I consider myself very pro-breastfeeding. I also consider myself very open-minded. So why is a doll that simulates breastfeeding creeping me out so much?

The doll, from Spanish toy maker Berjuan Toys, is called The Breast Milk Baby. The doll actually makes suckling sounds, prompted by sensors sewn into a halter top that comes with the doll. Kids can put the halter top on and actually “breastfeed,” complete with sound effects and all. From Yahoo News:

The dolls, eight in all with a variety of skin tones and facial features, look like many others, until children don the little top with petal appliques at the nipples. That’s where the sensors are located, setting off the suckling noise when the doll’s mouth makes contact. It also burps and cries, but those sounds don’t require contact at the breast.

Hmm. I’m really searching my soul for why this bothers me. I’ve come to the conclusion that I have been brainwashed by a culture that sexualizes anything “breast,” including the very natural act of feeding a child. I am a staunch proponent of breastfeeding, but I can honestly say that I would never buy this for my daughter. What gives?

I know that little girls feed dolls play bottles all of the time. Maybe it is the reality factor that is the difference here. A doll like this sort of bypasses make believe. I want a doll that makes suckling sounds at the “breast” of my daughter as much as I want a doll that actually poops a funky-smelling, sludgy diarrhea substance. Both things are natural – but, no thanks.

I probably just need to do some more soul-searching. Especially considering that I am on the same side as Bill O’Reilly. I never thought that would happen. “I just want the kids to be kids,” O’Reilly said on his Fox News show when he learned of The Breast Milk Baby. Yeah, me too.

The Yahoo News article about the doll is titled, “Breastfeeding baby doll: creepy or groundbreaking.” One of the commenters replied, “Um … creepily groundbreaking?”