I Would Rather Not Meet The Men Who Drink Breast Milk

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I try to be an accepting, nonjudgmental person and yet, when I think about grown men drinking breast milk in instances that do not include their imminent death, I get a little extremely fucking grossed out. I can understand being curious. I can understand squirting a little in your coffee just for funsies to see what it’s like.

What I can’t understand is sourcing and drinking breast milk for 17 years because it makes an excellent base for a béchamel to pour over your zucchini fauxghetti or because you’ve convinced yourself it will make you stronger, faster, or better.

There’s also something a little strange about all of these online breast milk marketplaces being co-opted by adult male milk fiends. One mom who got on the Only The Breast website in the hopes of helping other moms was understandably skeeved out by the sheer volume of men asking her for milk, saying:

“It creeped me out to the extent that it made me second-guess the responses from women … I wondered whether there were even women on this thing, or just men trolling for milk.”

Ah. So, I guess it comes down to this: whatever two consenting adult people do is their own damn business, and that includes buying or selling unregulated bodily fluids on the internet and then consuming them. Similarly, I’d much rather live in a world where breastfeeding isn’t perceived of as “gross”, even if that means that this is the alternative to that. So carry on, bosom brothers. I’ll just be over here scowling.

(Image:Inna Astakhova/Shutterstock)

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