Childrearing
Mommyish Debate: Is Blowing Your Stack With Your Kids Bad Parenting?
Lindsay: But if a parent loses their temper, it can still be taken out on their kids. If you’re stressed and emotional, your child is in your home with you. Plenty of times, something small that your child does becomes the straw that broke the camel’s back. Raising kids does not happen in a vacuum.
Eve: Yeah but shouldn’t people be smart and self-aware enough to see that this straw is just a symptom of bigger issues and not take it out on their kid?
Lindsay: Yes, because when people are stressed and frustrated, that’s normally when they’re also at their smartest and most self aware. And should people? Sure. Are they always? Obviously not. There’s a reason that during financial recessions and difficult economic climates, child abuse soars.
Eve: I don’t think this happens a lot actually. I think most people are smarter than this.
Lindsay: I think you’re only considering a very small group of parents who you would identify with.
Eve: Umm, no, because I have been every parent. Yeah, maybe a really young mom with no life skills needs these lessons but most people of a certain age kinda grow up and realize that their kids are separate from their problems.
Lindsay: Every year, there are 3.3 million reports of child abuse in our country. A lot of that would likely come from people who can’t process their stress and anger. And that’s a whole lot of parents and a whole lot of kids.
Eve: OMG, you Googled! Well, people who can’t process their anger shouldn’t have kids.
Lindsay: And yet, they do. All the time. And the only thing we can do to help those kids is to teach more people how to process their anger.
Eve: And you can disagree that maybe they need to lighten up? See, I am so sick of this mentality, that people need all these coping skills. People need coping skills because in america we are fat and rich and pretty. Do you really think parents in the Congo sit there and say, “Wow, I need to know how to process my anger better?” We create these problems. We create problems when there aren’t any.
Lindsay: Those are not comparable. And you can’t just say that no one has issues that are worth mentioning because they aren’t living in third world country.
Eve: What I am saying is we sure do have a lot of non-issues in America that we take out on our kids, and I think this mollycoddling parents is sorta lame.
