Childrearing

10 Rejected Lunchables Flavors

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are lunchables healthyI am #unapologetic about my love for Lunchables. Because I work at home and take medication that kills my appetite, I will usually either forget to eat or realize sometime right before the school bus is due up at the corner that if I don’t eat something soon I will probably die. For that reason, these little sodium packed “meat” treats are my go-to “meal”. I just love sandwiching little bits of hurkey between what might either be mayo or cheese and washing the whole thing down with a mimosa, a combination that I call “Boozables”.

boozables

Sometimes I pretend that I’m buying them for my daughter, and then, once the wave of guilt that comes with potentially feeding your child known carcinogens hits, I blissfully slap some peanut butter onto some bread and hoard these little bad boys for myself, excited for the fridge-temperature chicken nuggets and rubberized cheese product that awaits me later on in the day.

I understand that these are bad for me, much in the way that I understand that washing them down with Andre’s is also bad for me, which is why I had to wonder; “what flavor of Lunchables would they have to come out with for me to stop eating these little salty bits of goodness”?

1. Spamburger Sliders

2. Liverwurst and Onion Kablobbles

3. Head Cheese, Crab Dip, and Hollandaise Sauce Roll-ups

4. Mini Tripe ‘n’ Tongue Snackers

5. XTreme Salmon Loaf with Nerds Candy

6. Chicken Giblets Dunkers

7. Egg Salad Snackwraps

8. Tuna Ceviche Poppers

9. Deep Dish Haggis 

10. Mini “Shrimp”ables

(Image: Lyudmila Suvorova/Shutterstock)