It’s My Favorite Thing When Couples Awkwardly Talk To Each Other Using Only Facebook

fbAccording to the latest headlines, teens today are embarrassed to use Facebook and are even going so far as to unfriend their parents. I guess it’s a sign of the times that Facebook is niche to “our generation.” Twenty to forty-somethings and even Baby Boomers seem to use Facebook to communicate on the daily.

I’m as guilty as the rest of them. I really, really love Facebook for several reasons. First, I work at home with my kids and husband, and I have no coworkers to chat with or gossip about. Any little thing that happens on Facebook I immediately bring to my husband’s attention (OMG! So-and-so is pregnant again!), and he normally shrugs and is like, whatevs. I’ve also used Facebook to reconnect with many old friends that I still have strong relationships with, so that’s also a win.

But I’ve noticed an interesting phenomenon among Facebook users, mainly married Facebookers in my age bracket. These married couples I know, and I’m not just talking about a few, use Facebook as their main means of communication.

We all know how the Facebook rules work, right? If you are friends with two people, you’ll automatically see interactions between the same two people on your newsfeed. I know these married couples also know this, but they continue to talk to each other about mundane or annoying lovey-dovey stuff that shows up in the main timeline for all to see.

So, along with other random updates, I’ll see a lengthy conversation between Dick and Jane about who needs to grab milk or fast food on the way home from work. Even worse and more awkward are the love exchanges that seem to be purposely public in a public forum. Dick may just want to take a quick minute to tell Jane how she brightened his morning by making him coffee and how she’s the best wife in the world (#lovemywife). Jane will respond back by saying, “D’awww, babe!!” And adding a few compliments and hashtags of her own.

It’s really freaking awkward to watch. I know these people have heard of texts because they’re probably using Facebook from their smartphones. Also, Facebook has a very nifty function that maybe, possibly, Dick and Jane have never heard of. It’s called PRIVATE MESSAGES, people!!!

I just really don’t understand. My husband and I work in the same house and spend the majority of the day on chat (Facebook also has a chat function, BTW!). Sometimes I’ll send him really cheesy texts that are for his eyes only. I’ve probably never sent him a public post on Facebook, unless it’s some dumb picture that I share to his timeline. No wonder the kids these days are kicking the Facebook to the curb.

(photo: Getty Images)

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