having a baby
The 10 Things New Parents Need Most That You Won’t Find On Any Registry
Baby showers are a nice way to set up soon-to-be parents with all the things they need to survive their baby’s arrival. But there are a lot of things new parents might not realize they need, and a lot of them aren’t stocked on the shelf at the local Babies ‘R’ Us. Looking for a shower gift? Pick up one of these and throw in a cute onesie for the little one, and call it a day.
1. Scented candles
Sorry to break it to you, expecting parents, but your future kids’ shit is going to stink. Nothing lingers in the air like eau de dirty diaper, but you can at least mask it by lighting a cupcake-scented candle at the Altar of Breathability.
2. Hair ties
Registering for childproofing stuff is common enough, but hair ties are what everyone’s going to need once crawling tots figure out how to work the latches and clips. Plus, it’s always nice to have extras on hand to put your hair up before tackling a diaper poopslosion.
3. Clorox wipes
The outside world is disgusting. So are toddlers. I’m a big fan of germ exposure, but sometimes (like when the dog leaves a ‘surprise’ on the kitchen floor) only the cleansing power of Clorox and/or a flamethrower will cut it.
4. Tylenol
Not baby Tylenol. The adult kind. You’re going to need it. So, so much of it. (Psst … better make it extra strength.)
5. Gift certificates to Lenscrafters
Within five minutes of learning how to grab for objects, your baby is going to try to whip the glasses off of your face. A backup pair is a must, unless you like trying to take care of an infant while stumbling around like Mr. Magoo.