Can We Please Stop Talking About Beyonce’s Abdomen?

beyonceThere are moments of acceptance in a person’s life when you have to stop getting worked up and angry about things you can’t change. You stop shaking your head, you raise your shoulders just a bit and you calmly try to move on, knowing that there are things in the universe that are beyond your control. It’s a difficult thing to do. But it’s necessary for a person’s well being. For me, the media obsession with Beyonce‘s stomach is one of those things that I’m going to have to get over.

Did the bump deflate? Is there a new bump? Is she covering her stomach with a big purse? Is her outfit specifically designed to highlight or conceal the presence of a growing person in her uterus?

Beyonce could carry around a portable ultrasound machine constantly connected to her abdomen and there would still be rumors and tabloid covers and pictures on the internet with hand-drawn arrows pointing at her midsection.

Last night, Beyonce made a surprise appearance at Jay-Z‘s concert at Barclay’s. She was wearing a tight leather outfit that kind of made it look like she’d eaten in the past week. Since we obviously know this can’t be true, the geniuses at Hollywood Life decided this must mean that the woman is pregnant again.

To be fair, the rumors have been swirling around the internet for a couple of weeks that Beyonce is pregnant with baby number two just nine months after having little Blue Ivy Carter in the world’s biggest fanfare pregnancy ever. Of course, Hollywood Life is the onethat started the rumors in the first place. Apparently, they’re pushing this one hard. Kind of the weekly tabloids and their countless covers claiming that Jennifer Aniston is pregnant.

But if it wasn’t a random celebrity blog, it would be another. Or it would be a OK! Magazine. Or an E! News host would see Beyonce with a sweater on and say, “Could she be hiding her bump until the next awards show?” No matter where it comes from, I feel like we’ll never reach a point where someone in the media isn’t intensely scrutinizing Beyonce’s stomach. We’ll never stop asking if that’s a bump or if she just ate lunch.

Every time these stories come up, I kind of want to pull my hair out. I want to say, “Seriously? Find something else. Find something better to spend your time talking about. Beyonce’s stomach is not this exciting.” But the world just doesn’t seem to agree with me. I’m on an island, all alone, not wanting to hear about a celebrity’s uterus.

I think this is one of those situations that I’m just going to have to accept. So go ahead and picture me raising my shoulders just a little bit, slightly shaking my head, and pretending to care just a tad about what Beyonce wore at a performance last night and whether it looked like she might possibly have a baby in that non-existent belly.

(Photo: WENN)

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