Back To School Week: Why I’ve Wanted To Homeschool Since Birth

homeschoolPrior to having a family, Bethany Gonzalez Moreno had always planned to homeschool her children. The B. EcoChic founder felt that she was not properly challenged in her own scholastic career, which included both private and public schools. Her husband had a similar experience. Since welcoming their daughter, now 20 months, Bethany feels even more assured in her decision.

The mother of one tells Mommyish that the local schools in her community are supposed to have a pretty good reputation. But that she and her husband explicitly want their daughter to learn at her own pace, not according to computerized exam quotas.

“Like all public schools, they have to prepare kids to do well on standardized tests,” she says. “And even a teacher in a school with an A rating may not be able to differentiate instruction for each individual student. That’s just the reality of teaching many kids at once.” Bethany acknowledges that her daughter may move quickly through some subjects and need additional help in others. “Either way, we think learning is more enjoyable when you aren’t held behind or forced to move ahead before you’re ready.”

She particularly finds the socialization of the classroom to be troubling, as well as the homogenous treatment that all children receive in a conventional academic setting. The mother finds the idea of keeping a large number of children, all born in the same year, together for 13 years as “not natural” or “normal.” She describes the practice as a “relatively new phenomena in the history of the human race.”

“I believe it is responsible for many of the issues we’re dealing with with kids,” Bethany elaborates when considering traditional classrooms. “Children have always spent time with members of all ages from their tribe or village. They looked up to and emulated children a few years older, and learned how to nurture the younger children. They could carry on a conversation with an adult or an elder. Today’s children spend all day long with 29 of their age peers in a room. They may have nothing in common except the year they were born and they will develop many of their social skills by socializing with other immature children. The only adult in the room, the teacher, has nowhere near the social influence peers do. I want my daughter to be able to relate well to people of all ages, and school isn’t a good place to practice.”

Although she has considered the private schools nearby, she finds the tuition costs to be out of sync with their family’s priorities. She and her husband would rather use that same money for a family trip to Europe or to other historical spots around the United States, a decision she hopes that her daughter will be grateful for.

When I ask Bethany when she plans to start moving forward with her long anticipated homeschooling project, she affirms that she has already begun. The family has a Montessori-inspired homeschooling room in their home with low cubbies so that Bethany’s daughter can choose different activities. At this stage in the game, the mother says that she is adhering to Maria Montessori‘s “follow the child” method, as her daughter often requests puzzles and alphabet games. Although Bethany does present her daughter with new puzzles and projects from time to time, it is her daughter who asks to learn.

“She used to regularly carry her wooden alphabet over to me and dump it at my feet so that I’d come sit on the floor and go over it with her. She also demands we come watch and help her, if needed, when she does her jigsaw puzzles.,” she says.

At present, the mother has a two-piece jigsaw puzzle that teaches colors, in addition to a four-, six- , nine-, and 12-piece jigsaw puzzle for regular use, which she believes are perfect for motor skill development and understanding how objects relate to one another. Between puzzle time and the baby’s beloved alphabet sets, the toddler appears to be learning well.

“I taught her all her upper and lower case letters a few months ago with wooden letters and a favorite wooden puzzle of hers. I’m now teaching her the sounds each letter makes with two-piece picture and letter jigsaw puzzles,” Bethany explains.

As her daughter gets older, she says that she is planning on doing a more “eclectic mix” that includes unit studies, in which the child studies one topic in depth covering an array of different subjects, and the Classical Method. Both she and her husband are reading with her regularly and have already started teaching her Latin.

However, Bethany adds that she and her daughter’s father are only planning to continue with homeschooling for “as long as it is working for my family.” Although she is pleased that her little girl is starting out as a homeschooler, she would be receptive to trying school at her daughter’s request.

The normal criticisms Bethany has already started hearing about homeschooling is about socialization and social life, an area that she is not particularly worried about given her other efforts. The family is already a part of a few homeschooling co-ops with other families and kids. Parents organize field trips and mini classes on topics of interest, including a Spanish tutor for five children at time or a LEGO Robotics time. Needless to say, her daughter sees other children. Besides, it’s not like school is necessarily supposed to be a hub of social functions.

“Do you remember what your grade school teachers said when they reprimanded you for talking to friends in class?” asks Bethany. “‘We’re not here to socialize!'”

(photo: Serhiy Kobyakov/ Shutterstock)

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